Hello simmers, and welcome back to the second update of the random legacy Randominov.
- Objectives of this random-NOT- update:
to make you laugh with randomness…yeah whatever, who cares? I need to survive this update. Whichever comes first: university or babies…that’s all.
- Obstacles: First update was boring. If you are reading this one I LOVE YOU SO MUCH RIGHT NOW I COULD CRY… T_T
Okay, so last time you learned that I suck at improvising, I knew it already, but still this legacy must prevail.
A recap of last chapter:
In a nutshell.
Oh, that’s right we also got to meet our
lame sexy founder,
Ivan Randominov (AKA El Boris. It was a bit randomly given)
For all the randomness that went on, I can say that there are a few things that could relate in more than one aspect….but I digress.
Alright let’s get this party started,
woohoo!! Hopefully I can produce a better and a lot more entertaining update than the last one. FIGHTING BORIS!
What’s with the ‘FIGHTING’ anyway?
Oh that’s just something Korean’s say for, ya know, encouragement.
Are you Korean?
No. I’m Cuban.
Sum it up, and GET MY NAME RIGHT! For pete’s sake.
Okay, okay. Despite the lame night at the Karaoke, Ivan came home a happy camper,
*I have no idea what’s so fun about meeting two girls that ditched him, but…*
Right. The next day I had him call Kitty; I was surprised to see even though she looked bore at the karaoke they still had a pretty good connection going. Naturally, as a man with a motive (impregnate a female with two babies and then kick her out) Ivan was kind to invite her out on a date.
She is not coming. She is not coming. She is not coming.
Relax Ivan, you are making me nervous.
Several random sec later…
OMG she IS NOT coming!! T_T
More random secs later…
KITTY!! Alright Ivan, please, PLEAAASE…don’t mess this one up. Isn’t there something interesting to talk about?
Okay, calm down, geez.
“Damn girl you are so fine you raise my bloody-meter.”
OH. MY. LOOOOOORD.
Kay, moving on…
“Question. Who is this creep always following us around?”
“Oh that’s just my personal paparazzi/body-guard.”
“Geez you can have one of those? Combine?”
“Totally. Why you think I’m so famous?”
“By the way I love my new house. It’s huge, wanna come with?”
Paparazzi/body-guard: I’m in love.
After a bit of silly faces –which pictures I stupidly erased-they both went inside the Coffee shop. At which point I was starting to get impatient. If Kitty was not clear enough about her intentions, I think this improvisation can win the Nobel Prize.
What are you doing crazy man? She wants you to go home with her.
Let me handle my own dates.
“Is nice in here Ivan, but did I tell you what a big bed I just ordered? I mean it’s HUGE. As in, double. As in, you can do lots of stuff in it. Besides sleep. With like, body-guards–”
“Oh yeah that sounds…attractive…let’s have some drinks first.”
IF YOU DON’T MOVE THINGS WITH THIS GIRL BORIS YOU….I SWEAR…
“Red roses for a more beautiful rose.”
“Oh Ivan, they are gorgeous!”
I’ll be damned; this was actually not a bad line…but we still need a bit of work to do…
What work, she loves my sexiness…
Well, I think you could use a little bit more of…
…originality. Hey! That’s too…
“Ugh, you are such a jerk Ivan Randominov! I’m out of here!”
Kitty: I bet he is trying to figure out how to make it up to me. This ‘hard to get’ shit better work. I wanna put my new body-guard to use.
Paparazzi/body-guard: Forget you conceited bitch, I found a more fascinating subject.
Ivan: This was a great group outing. I Think.
So where am I going now woman?
Okay, okay. So I was a bit aggressive back there, she’ll get over it, and you’ll have your babies. Happy now?
You know what to do…
Alright. After the not so great date with Kitty, I sent Ivan to the summer festival. I was hoping for a scene full of joyful young girls who cannot wait to get their hands on a handsome male (this would be Ivan) and have their babies. What? Clearly you did not watch the Twilight Saga. Ivan decides to roller-skate as soon as he gets there. Great.
Good luck Boris! I was never good with any of those things.
*roller-skating. The 80’s. Pink satin shirts.*
I see no females…
Kay. Let’s give this another chance…
*“They wanted to rock, they wanted to roll…” What is this???? Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Brotherhood? Screw you Lucky Palms!! I’m going to have to make a female sim myself *
Annnnd the phone rings. At this point I could care less.
YES YES YES!
Now. Can we hope for better, more fluent conversations? Is that too much to ask of you Ivan? I tell ya, you and your lame pick-up lines will be the death of me T_T
Woman, relax…I got this!
That’s the problem. T_T
“Kitty? Oh hi, happy to hear you again. So soon.
“Yes, I’ll love to go play on your humongous bed. What? Teddy bear games?
“That sounds strange; I’m not sure I know what that is…”
“Oh…what, I fall on your bed and your body-guards hug me down while you watch?”
*Body-guards.Teddy bears. Bondage.*
Despite the conversation of teddy bears and large beds where bizarre games could take place at Kitty’s house, Ivan was happy she called him.
Haha, I feel great. Let’s get this contest starting!
You MUST win Boris, I mean Ivan 😀
We could use the festival tickets…
IVAN! IVAN! IVAN!
IVAN! IVAN! IVAN! IVAN!
Annnnn the winner is…
I love hot dogs!
Yeah well, no one cares Boris.
Many random secs later…
Darn Hot Dogs!
Go to sleep!
Ivan on his sleep: “I’m not your damn teddy bear.”
Oh-Kay, moving on…
Next morning Kitty showed up at the house.
WHEN CAN I GET SOME ACTION UP IN…
Finally!!! Can I hear the trumpets of victory please?
“Let’s go upstairs to my bed.”
Uhmm, if I may say something…
“Never mind, my bed is too small, let’s use the shower…”
My point. Exactly.
HOLD ME DOWN BECAUSE I”M ABOUT TO BRAKE SOMETHING!
THIS. My friends, is the sad end of an otherwise fruitful afternoon for Ivan and Kitty.* When EA built this house, they did not have ‘baby-making-in-shower-time’ in mind.*
So, yeah. This is where Kitty left, Ivan was trapped in the shower –alone; and I went to a corner and cried because we had NO MONEY, NO UNIVERSITY, NO BABIES!
We needed a way to make money fast, and I was really losing hope when the goddess (as Ivan says) blessed us with a much welcomed call:
“So you want me to do a kid commercial? I must dress as a Llama? But I’m a YA.”
Whatever Boris…we need the money…off you go:
Sadly I forgot to snap a shot of the ‘kachin’ but Ivan made 5000 simoleons!! Hooray for money!!
T_T Bills piled up…
Now I can get a bigger bed and invite Kitty again. Away from her huge house. Large bed. Teddy bear games. Ew.
NO. You are going to University.
And just in case…
We are going to univeristy!! Alright! Good going Boris-boo.
I’m so proud of you right now ma Boris, I could cry. T_T
And this is the end for this update…next: University life.
This a piece of cake. Watch…I’m gonna do like a bird… like flying…
Thanks for reading guys! I have played far ahead and things get way better for this legacy. Playing with a single founder is hard to get things moving *sigh*
Oh darn it!! Okay. Here.
Now come back!